Hey Reader,

Something happened the other day that I can’t stop thinking about.

Life

My 4-year-old daughter was getting dressed. She was wrestling with a pair of leggings, one leg in, the other leg doing its own thing, the waistband twisted. You know the drill. 😅

I almost stepped in to help, but before I could, she looked up at me and said:

“I’m capable of putting my pants on, but sometimes it’s difficult.”

I just stood there for a second.

This is a four-year-old. And she just drew a line between two ideas that most adults still confuse: being able to do something and that something being easy.

She didn’t say “I can’t,” or ask me to do it for her. She said, “I can do this. And it’s hard right now.” Both things…at the same time!

I honestly don’t even know where she picked up the word “capable,” but I’m glad she did, because she just described exactly what I see in students and parents every single week!

Homeschool + Math

Think about the last time your student sat down for math and said, “I can’t do this.”

What they probably meant was, “This is really hard right now.” But somewhere along the way, hard and impossible got tangled up together. And when a child believes that struggling means they can’t, they stop trying. Why would you keep going if you’ve already decided you’re not able?

This is one of the sneakiest things about math anxiety, and it happens to parents too. You sit down to help with fractions or long division, and the thought that crosses your mind isn’t “this is difficult.” It’s “I can’t do this. I was never good at math.” Hard became a verdict instead of a description.

But my daughter, in her leggings, got it right.

Capable and easy are two completely different things. Your student can be fully capable of learning a concept and still find it genuinely difficult. Both of those are true at the same time, and believing they exist at the same time is what keeps a learner moving forward instead of shutting down.

So here’s something you can try. The next time your student says “I can’t do this,” gently reframe it: “You can do this. And it’s okay that it’s hard right now.” Those words aren’t a pep talk or false hope, they are the truth. And hearing it from you, the person they trust most, changes the whole emotional temperature of the lesson.

You can do the same thing for yourself, by the way. The next time you’re stuck on how to explain a concept, try saying it out loud: “I’m capable of teaching this. And right now it’s difficult.” See how different that feels from “I’m just not a math person?”

Grace

You know what I keep coming back to about that leggings moment?

She didn’t need me to fix it. She needed me to stand there and let her be right about herself: that she could do a hard thing, even if it took a minute.

I think God does the same thing with us more often than we realize. We’re in the middle of something hard, convinced we need to be rescued from it, and He’s standing right there saying, “You can do this. I made you capable. And I’m not going anywhere while you figure it out.”

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” Psalm 73:26 (ESV)

My flesh and my heart may fail…or rather WILL fail, cause we are all human! But that’s not the end of the sentence. He is the strength underneath the failing. Capable and struggling, at the same time, held by Someone who never expected us to do it alone. ❤️

“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” Ephesians 2:10 (ESV)

He made you capable of teaching your kids, of learning hard things alongside them, and of doing the work He’s put in front of you this week. Capable doesn’t mean it won’t be hard. It means you were built for it, and He’s standing right there while you figure it out. ❤️

See you soon!

-Mrs. Holman

P.S. She did get the leggings on, by the way. Took her a solid two minutes. She was very proud of herself. 😊 What’s a phrase your kid says that you want to remember forever? Hit reply and tell me. These are the moments that make it all worth it.